2004 was not a good year for our family. I remember its beginning like it was yesterday.
It was January, and i was working on a clients website. My back was to the door, and I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Nothing special there, but I remember them so clearly. The door opened, and Mum entered the living room.
“Eliza, I think I’ve found a lump.”
That single moment sits like a freeze frame in my mind. Everything seemed to stop. My fingers frozen on the keyboard, my eyes glued to the screen. I’m pretty sure it didn’t quite play out like that, but thats how I remember it, because, that split second seemed to last an eternity.
Mum was diagnosed with breast cancer in January 2004. It was grade 3, but had not spread to the surrounding lymph nodes, in that at least we were lucky. The process of diagnosis was almost as hard as the treatment for Mum. While taking the core biopsy they misfired three times because the gun was not working, thus causing Mum a lot of pain. The equipment was old, and didn’t work as it should.
The consultant said that at its rate of growth it would have spread to the surrounding lymph nodes within weeks if she had not found the lump then. When she first visited the consultant it was about the size of a walnut, by the time of the operation it had tripled in size — very little time later. She had a lumpectomy, closely followed by a course of chemotherapy and radiotherapy.
Early August she had a checkup. The treatment had worked, and she was free of cancer. Although technically she could not be given the all clear for another five years. Overjoyed we called in at Grandma’s on the way home. She was nearly 85, and Mum’s health was giving her concern. We were not expected. We walked in on a conversation between Grandma, my Aunt and a Consultant.
There’s that freeze frame again. In my memory I seem to be stood in that doorway a long time. You see, at the precise time Mum was being given the all clear for her breast cancer, my Grandma was being told that she too had breast cancer. This time it was only stage one. Only.
2004 was not the best year. But we were lucky. Both Mum and Grandma recovered from their operation, and are still alive and almost fighting fit. Others were not so lucky. It is as important to continue to raise awareness for breast cancer, as it is to raise the funds to help fight it. This is why efforts like Pink for October are so wonderful, and why I am proud to turn my website pink next month — even though I am famously known for stating “there is a place for pink, and its not on the web.”
Well, in October, there is a place for pink, and its everywhere.
—Eliza.
I’m in my 30s and had breast cancer surgery a few months ago. My mom had breast cancer when I was in my 20s, so I knew that I was at a higher risk, and I started having screenings early — that’s how they found mine. I was just having a routine screening, and had to repeat the right side, over and over, about 6 times. My mammography center’s amazing… somehow, they saw this tiny, tiny cluster & told my doctor that I needed a diagnostic screening.
For my case, this involved something called a “stereotactic core biopsy.” I had a local anesthetic, and 2 doctors guided a needle into the area of the cancer, and pulled three “cores” or tubes of tissue. At the same time, they shot a tiny marker into the area where the cancer was, to identify it for further study. It didn’t really hurt much, and the whole thing was done pretty quickly. Unfortunately, the results of the biopsy showed cancer.
So, a little later in the summer, I had a lumpectomy. Luckily, my cancer was early enough not to require chemo, but I was supposed to have radiation. In the meantime, I had some unusual circumstances*, so I’m opting to pursue an aggressive monitoring routine every 6 months. If monitoring turns up anything, I’m going in for surgery again.
I can’t stress how important it is for women to take this aspect of their health seriously. And don’t assume that you’re safe if you’re under 40 or even under 30. If you have a family history, get tested as soon as you can. It goes without saying that having cancer is tough, but it’s tougher if it doesn’t get caught early. Be smart & if you feel a lump, get it checked out. Get your screening mammography when you can, and if you need to have diagnostic mammography, follow up on it right away.
To cope with the feelings this whole ordeal gave me, I started a blog called DIY, not d-i-e. Obviously, there’s not a lot of us who are specifically craft-DIYers-with-cancer, but we few needed a refuge from the corporate cancer organizations, a place where we still felt like us, and not like some generic segment of society. Not too long ago, Knitty, the indie knitting zine, had a feature of Beryl Tsang’s Tit-Bits, a hand-knitted prosthetic for the indie woman… clearly, there’s ways to do cancer that still lets my crowd be who we are. That’s important.
If I had felt that my identity was suffering in an anonymous pink crowd as well as having all the biopsy/surgery/treatment stuff, it would have really depressed me. Breast cancer shouldn’t re-define anyone… I think it’s important to stay yourself. Conformity freaks me out as much as cancer does.
There are some amazing organizations out there who are raising money for breast cancer research and raising awareness about breast cancer in young women. A couple of worthwhile charities’ sites to check out:
- Keep A Breast makes plaster casts of female torsos, and artists use them as canvases for artwork which is auctioned off. Some of the artists who’ve gotten involved include Corey Sheppard and Dalek…KAB also works with companies like Roxy and Fuel TV, to get the word out to the young surf-snow-skate crowd.
- Boarding for Breast Cancer is another fine awareness organization that commemorates a young boarder who got breast cancer at 26, and passed away at 28. They put a lot of emphasis on education and awareness.
- Circus of Cancer is for a breast cancer patient’s friends to figure out what they can do to help. I’ve seen it firsthand… people were really freaked out, and not sure what they should be doing, if they should talk about it, if they should leave me alone… this is a good site to send people to.
- My boyfriend recommends Men Against Breast Cancer… there’s really not a lot of resources for guys. My recommendation is this: guys, if your wife or girlfriend has breast cancer, talk to a friend about what you’re going through. Hopefully, a few more guys will start more support-role websites or start a charity or organization, and gather the forces. There needs to be more for men to turn to during their partner’s breast cancer. (And don’t forget… men can get breast cancer, too. Men also need to understand when a lump needs a doctor’s opinion.)
I’m glad there’s efforts like Pink for October, too… this is a really nice idea for showing some unity and awareness-gathering, online. I also wanted to thank Matthew and Brian and all involved for the opportunity to share some of my story.
Cheers, all & stay healthy.
—pocketina.
*While waiting for my surgery, I noticed a lump in my neck and ended up having my thyroid removed (thyroid cancer) —I’ll undergo treatment for that in a few weeks. I’m totally pissed off that all of this happened, but I’m so, so glad that I have my family, my boyfriend, my friends, and an understanding employer.